Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift, that's why they call it present...

Friday, December 31, 2010

Looking back on 2010...but moving forward into 2011

As we come to the end of 2010 I look back on what a remarkable year it’s been. I have achieved SO many of my goals, and been lucky enough to be rewarded with bountiful opportunities.
As this year ends it makes me think about what I’ve done over the last year, what I’ve accomplished, who I’ve met, and the new goals I have yet to achieve. I’ve been told over and over to write them down, set a date and I will have a better chance at accomplishing them. I think I will also write WHY it’s important for me to attain these goals too. Keeps me FOCUSED & present.

In no particular order...

To become a LuLu Lemon Ambassador by August 2011-I love Lulu Lemon. I wear it, I live by it, and I support it 100%. Everything they stand for as a company (their manifesto) I work to reflect in the way I live my life. They have helped me achieve my goals so far and I would love nothing more than to show my support and be a part of the LuLu Lemon team. I think it would be a great way to reach higher pinnacles as a community, as well as working with everyone involved to reach our own.

Make Planet Workout’s “Yoga Studio” and ACTUAL YOGA STUDIO BY 2012- I have been honoured to have my own studio inside PW and as grateful as I am, it’s not fully complete yet. I’m going to soundproof those walls so my students can practice in a quiet place. I ‘m going to change the floor to bamboo or cork so my student can feel safe, clean and balanced as they practice their flows. I’m going to have the ability to heat the room and practice HOT yoga for those who have never tried it and want to give it a shot. I’m going to change the lights so my students can have the comfort they deserve while relaxing in Savasana. I know the changes will only make the studio a better place to practice as well very beneficial for the gym as well.

Raise my clientele by 50% by the end of 2011-With the help of marketing, advertising, networking and the community I’m going to raise my clientele & get myself out there so I can be more recognized in the yoga and city community.

Participate in at least 3 fundraisers before the end of 2011 & to raise more than $1000 for April’s 2011 YOGA IN MOTION- I was part of an amazing team last year for Yoga in Motion-Team Kula. As a group we raised over $5000 and individually I was able to raise $800. I would like to reach my personal goal of $1000 and see what we can do this year as a team.

http://mtsinaiauxiliary.akaraisin.com/pledge/Participant/Home.aspx?seid=3736&mid=9&Lang=en-CA&pid=454214

Put on my own fundraiser in the summer to raise money for charity (not sure which one yet) I have always wanted to set something up on my own with LOTS of people, friends and family, music and have it of course be yoga inspired. I’m thinking something maybe in the park, with a DJ and LOTS of yoga mats, a BBQ right beside the water.

I definitely want to travel. Bali, Costa Rica and Thailand are my TOP 3 choices. I would like to visit these 3 places before I’m 30...so I’m lucky I have 3 full years to do this. Maybe one trip a year?!

As I look back on 2010 I am reminded with each goal I have made and how I was truly blessed to attain EACH one. I am thankful for my entire family that stood by and supported each step in my journey to learning about who I was, who I am and who I want to be. I am appreciative of all my friends who have shown me support and been there to help me out when I needed it. I am SO grateful for my new friends who have taught me more than I could have ever imagined.
I am continually realizing that everyone who comes into our lives come to teach us something. Whether it be about the world or ourselves, and whether they stay or leave...be thankful for each of them! You learned something new and remember “The things we know best are the things we haven't been taught.”
There are so many more goals I would like to achieve. Personal and work related...too many to write down in this blog. I have written them down in my journal so I am able to keep track of my life and check off when completed. I also add new ones to the list daily.

Wishing ALL of you an amazing HAPPY NEW YEAR. All the best for 2011. Strive to think positive ALL the time as “GOOD THOUGHTS MAKE LIFE BETTER” Funny enough, this quote came from a fortune cookie. The ONLY fortune cookie that was ever REAL!
May you all have a joyful 2011 filled with LOTS of love, peace, good health, happiness, wealth and may good fortune follow you always!

Peace & Love

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

INSPIRED...again!

As a yoga teacher, there’s a lot asked of me during my class. Stay calm, be present, lead, guide, breath, help, teach and DO yoga!

I was blessed yesterday with an amazing class by my friend and fellow teacher Sophie. I hadn’t been to a HOT yoga class since my “incident” in the summer and didn’t even realize until I was lying on the floor in the heated room...enjoying the warmth. I was really nervous to get back into it, and didn’t want to step foot in a HOT yoga room for a while. It was funny how life brought me right back to where I belong as well as erased all fears. I was excited to see Sophie again, learn some new flows and sequences and ultimately be LEAD by someone. Although I practice everyday, whether it is with a class or on my own, personally I don’t push myself as FAR as I know I can. When you have a more experienced teacher “picking” on you throughout the entire class, you and your body work HARD!

I should clear up the term “picking on” I use this term in the most endearing way possible. I LOVE being helped and guided. She knows what she’s talking about and does her best to show me the before and after and helps me reach my optimal blueprint so I can learn and from there be a better teacher myself.

I noticed it most in my downward dog. “See how that part of your back is like a trampoline” *mouth noises* along with simple adjustments...no more trampoline back. I was secure, strong and WOW was I feeling it too. Have I gotten lazy? During the next 20-30 downward dogs we did I tried to adjust myself in the same way so I was able to feel what she helped me feel in the first place. I know now what I was missing, but WHY have I been missing this?

Have I gotten *GASP* Lazy?

When I’m teaching my class it’s multitasking at its best...to say the least. I’m posing, teaching, adjusting, calming, centering, leading, walking, and talking. As a teacher do we find ourselves only doing the pose on the outside rather both inside and out?
I remember my roommate Lindsey and I were discussing this. We have to go quickly into a posture, and then out to help lead others in the pose. We’re walking around, and sometimes I’m not even doing the pose on my mat, obviously affecting the way I do the pose too.

I am very grateful I was able to attend Sophie’s class yesterday as it opened my eyes to the kind of teacher I want to be again. A gentle reminder of what I value in my class, in my students and most of all in myself.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Wait...where are you going?

When given the option to take at least one minute to lie down, close your eyes and RELAX (not to mention right after a 90 minute yoga flow) Why wouldn’t you take that option? This is what I use to look forward to most after a long, sometimes very difficult, HOT flow. Although I don’t teach HOT yoga, I’ve started to use the heater to get the room up to a comfortable 25 degrees during these frigid Canadian months.
Not even a minute into my “Savasana speech” I have people rolling up their mat and heading out the door. I’ve practiced and repeated this “Speech” 100X and I’m pretty sure I have it down pat *monotone voice*. I don’t think it’s me, I’m pretty sure it has to do with the fact that we’re all so busy racing from one part of our lives to the next; trying to squeeze everything in to one day/night...hour.

How important is Savasana?

Before I had studied the yoga path and began my journey, I use Savasana to just relax and rest. I never thought about the benefits of it, and that could be because I just wasn’t told. At the end of my practice, I was soaked and exhausted and very hot, so ultimately I needed to lie down.

Savasana is a vital closing of the physical yoga flow where prana (the breath) is given permission to become grounded, focused and calm. When one is practicing their poses, connection to prana is important as it connects the energy within and around you. Ending a practice without Savasana may lead to a feeling of disconnection, and healing of specific parts of the body and nervous system may be missed. Savasana can also be helpful in releasing stress, anxiety and lead to deeper connections with your higher self when in a meditative state.
I can understand where those withdraw from Savasana. Not only is it a relaxation pose, but like all other yoga poses, you must learn to surrender.
Those suffering from tight hip flexors, low back tension, neck strain and/or pelvic conditions this can be a very uncomfortable situation mentally and physically. It is important for you as a student to discuss injuries and/or conditions with your yoga teacher prior to taking the class, as it is equally important for your teacher to ask and be aware of all her students. You and your teacher should talk about modifications and restorative postures that will aid in the healing of these conditions.
Mentally, Savasana can also be unpleasant, as you may have feelings and emotions arise within. This is something that you can’t really modify; it’s all about surrendering and dealing with things at your own pace, when ready. If only we could stick a pillow under those thoughts to help cushion the blow sometimes.

As a teacher, I can’t force my students to lie down and relax. I believe just like everything else in this world, you’ve got to WANT it in order to make it happen. I feel if you’re not ready, you might be setting yourself up for failure. Take small baby steps, start with being grateful that you’re given this time to just close your eyes and be present in your body. I can only guide you and offer you the time, space and permission of a safe, blissful state. Take it, and explore the ideal position and modifications for Savasana so your body can enjoy the greater physical release, along with its wide range of healing benefits.

"Inhale, fill the lungs...exhale HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Values

As I was starting to design my sequence for my class tonight, one of my regular yogi’s popped into my head. Actually, just her voice did. A few weeks ago she asked if the postures would become more difficult. I advised her that I always lead a basic class and give the option to flow deeper if it felt right for your body, at that time. I told her in the future we would definitely move to more challenging postures, but as of right now I have more new people in my class everyday and don’t want to “frighten” them away from yoga by making it too difficult. As much as I talk about only going as far as YOUR body will allow, and repeating my favourite phrase by one of my mentors “It’s not about getting the pose, it’s about getting the pose to work for you” I know that takes time to sink in to everyone’s brain. I still watch as my yogi’s push themselves to bend, stretch further than they’re ready for, I can only show them the path, and it’s up to them to choose to follow. Most of the time they back out because of the pain, and I’m able to show them that if they’re patient and surrender to what is, good things will happen within them and they WILL get to where THEY want to be in THEIR practice.

There are a lot of things I value in a practice, my practice specifically. I enjoy sequencing poses that lead to deeper postures working out every muscle in the body. Every pose works in conjunction with the next pose to move you through the entire flow. To me, that’s what sequencing is all about. Personally in my practice I would never have pigeon near the start of the flow, I always have it towards the end as there are a lot of things that need to release before getting into a deep hip opening pose like that. I feel it would be more beneficial to open and release those muscles first, therefore being able to really reap the full benefits of the pose in the end.

I remember my roommate, Lindsey coming to me asking what my opinion was with starting with a pose early in her sequence like fire log. I appreciate her style and need to really push the limits of her students. At the time I was very surprised that she would do that to her poor students (LOL) BUT she explained to me her reasoning behind it and I was very much impressed, and ultimately taken to a new level of sequencing, and in the end true surrendering.
Have you ever tried a 6am HOT yoga class? Ya, me neither! However, I have made it to the 9am classes before and had a few battles with my body/mind. The last thing your body wants to do in the morning is stretch (maybe that’s just mine?) especially in a HOT room. You’re tired, you’re sore, you’re STIFF! Especially if you’re like me who works out at night and can feel it first thing in the morning. I know my body NEEDS it, but tend to fight against rather than submit.

Look at this as a gift rather than an annoyance. Where usually at the end of a long day you might be able to touch your toes; you’re NO where NEAR that first thing in the morning. Knowing you’ve done it before, puts you in the state of mind where you might push yourself beyond what your body is allowing at the time and end up doing more damage than good. This is a great time to recognize where you’re at right now, and really let go of what you expect from yourself. Be in the present and fully enjoy where your body is right then and there.

Who knows where you might reach to tomorrow? What I have learned in the past is that it will be greater height’s if you simply practice TODAY.

Oh ya, regarding my last blog that I simply ignored because at the time I was slightly (not gonna lie) a little disappointed. I have since then decided to look at the positives and realize how CLOSE I am to achieving another one of my goals.
I have been given the opportunity to teach Sunday yoga classes @ LuLu Lemon in Oakville starting in the New Year. AMAZING! Not only will I be a part of this amazing community of yoga teachers, athletes, and inspiring human beings, I will also be able to learn more about the company and integrate as much of myself into this amazing manifesto.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Crossing it off my list?

A couple weeks ago I received an email from a Lulu Lemon Educator saying how she wanted to come to one of my classes and meet with me afterwards for a chat. I was a little surprised because I’m not sure how she heard of me OR got my email. Evidently, if you know me and my intense love for Lulu Lemon, the company and everything they stand for and believe....you understand my excitement. I wrote back saying how I was honoured for her to take my class and would love the chance to talk to her afterwards. We decided to meet tonight, after class.

I have a few things going through my head; one of them is a big ambition of mine I’ve been trying to attain for a while now. I’m super stoked for my class tonight, along with the butterflies that are stirring in my stomach right now.

I’m going to be myself, I’m going to lead a wonderful class filled with amazing students, I’m going to shine bright and give it my all.

“Do one thing a day that scares you!”

Stay tuned for the update ;)....T-8 hrs....

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Daydreaming

Yoga Dork, a much-loved blog of mine recently posted an article asking “Are you happy? Don’t worry; Be Present new study says”

One of the lines written was “Does daydreaming make you happier?”As it turns out, no! It does not.

HUH!?!? It doesn’t? Well what kind of daydreaming are you doin? I guess this does have some truth behind it if you’re dreaming about negative stuff; however then I don’t put that into the class of “daydreaming” To me, daydreaming always had this positive, dreamy, wishful thinking state to it. Thinking about loved ones, your crush, what you’re going to do on the weekend, friends, pets, in general; things that make YOU happy.

“A daydream is a visionary fantasy, especially one of happy, pleasant thoughts, hopes or ambitions, imagined as coming to pass, and experienced while awake.”
I don’t think I have ever “daydreamed” about negative thoughts -“Unlike other animals, human beings spend a lot of time thinking about what is not going on around them, contemplating events that happened in the past, might happen in the future, or will never happen at all,” and if I did, I wouldn’t classify them as “daydreams” more like annoying thoughts that I cancel from my intellect right away.
I DO agree with the statement how being present can make you happier as long as that present state isn’t filled with annoying thoughts. At that point, I personally would take the time to daydream, think about the goal’s I have achieved and ones I have yet to, how I’m gonna make them happen, along with a million other things that make me happy.

I say be present, AND day dream!

“Everything starts as someone’s daydream” Larry Niven.

Thanks to http://www.yogadork.com/ for making me think ;)

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

"Yoga is for you. It's about you"

WOW! This was one of the most inspiring articles I've ever read!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/tara-stiles/yogas-big-secret_b_775467.html

Enjoy...

ONE YEAR LATER...

OMG....I missed my OWN anniversary. That’s what happens when you’re a busy yoga teacher ;)

It was officially a year on November 2nd. I read my post from last November when I first started my journey to become a yoga instructor. I was eager and alive with spirituality, and a little nervous as being back in the heat and sweat of a hot yoga room made my muscles tingle with the idea of where I would be in one year from now. Actually, I think I was on a shorter term, more like 6 months from now. I was already looking ahead and couldn’t wait to start. One year FLEW by, and SO many amazing things have happened.

I took the yoga teacher training course, passed along with 30 of the most amazing people I have EVER met. I made 30 new friends, and about 8 VERY close sister like relationships that will live strong forever. I moved in with two of those girls from my class and now have the best roommates anyone could ask for. I went on an emotional journey and learned more about myself in the past year than someone does in a life time. I not only conquered stale emotions, but postures I never thought I’d be able to do, let alone say. I did it ALL for me! As conceded as that may sound…it was really the first thing I have actually done for me, so I’m going to enjoy that!

Since then I have started teaching regular yoga classes at Planet Workout. It started as a pay as you go, and me having ZERO people. To being a part of the PW family, a paid instructor with over 18 people in my class. I finally got it FREE for members at PW and have been climbing my way to the top ever since. I have also gotten a few amazing guys to join who are now reaping all the benefits yoga has to offer. I am overwhelmed with gratefulness, smiles and love for everyone who helped me reach some of my goals. This has been an incredible journey thus far. I am excited to see where life, PW and yoga takes me next; Who I get introduced to? What amazing people will stumble into my path?

Shout outs to EVERYONE who has entered my life as you have made it THAT much better.

SO much appreciation to EVERYONE who has followed my blog so far. I’ve received lots of comments and letters from all of you letting me know that I wasn’t alone in this journey and THAT meant a lot!

Thank you!
Xo

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Static muscles?...I don't think so!

I was in my yoga studio last night doing my own practice. I love when I’m given the time to come to my mat...just me. I was so excited all day, and had been looking forward to doing some much needed postures.

As I was in some of the poses I tend to talk it out in my head, thinking about how I would teach it. I like to work on my skills as a teacher. I feel I use to talk a LOT during a posture, and now I give them some specifics, geography of limps, and muscles, but ultimately let them find their own way. I do make sure I keep a close eye on what’s happening with everyone’s bodies and assist when and where it’s needed.
I tend to get very focused during my practice and realized how in tune I actually am with my body compared to just a year ago. I always remember this one specific time during teacher training where we were working on Dandasana, or staff pose. I remember the woman I was working with telling me to root my femurs into the floor and hinge forward at the hips. She asked me to push my thighs into the ground and feel my hamstrings lengthen underneath me and draw the inner groins toward the sacrum.

WHAT?!?!?

I remember thinking to myself…how do you do that, and more so, how does one feel that inside their body. I think I told her I felt it when in actual fact I was SO confused.

Yesterday, sitting in Dandasana I was able to “GO” to all my body parts that needed to adjust and actually move them one by one. If you were watching me you probably wouldn’t have even noticed that so many things were going on inside me. Lengthening, moving, spiraling, rooting, supporting.
It was pretty amazing to observe, and the sensations of being able to mentally and physically go to those separate muscles, ligaments and bones and move them into position made me VERY thankful for how far I’ve come and how much I’ve learned.

On another happier note: I am able to do Eka Pada Rajakapotasana completely on my right side. My hips are a lot more open and my ankle is feeling a lot less tight. It only took 2 months of hard work, positive thinking, and lots of love.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Detachment leads to freedom.

Again life is trying to get me to learn my lesson. I sometimes feel there are two parts to me. The one who KNOWS the answers and the truth, and the other who wants to not necessarily wants to play with fire, but feels the need to prove something…and not even to myself? What the hell is THAT all about?
I heard about a story about a jar that you drop nuts into for the monkeys. The monkey then comes along, reaches in and grabs a handful of nuts and tries to pull his fist out but he cannot. If he would just let go, he would be able to escape.
I guess they were trying to prove that “letting go=freedom” and I’m sure it does. However I can’t help but think, what if he only pulls one nut out at a time, little by little, he’ll get to enjoy the nut for the time being, and come back for more later?

What happens when there are no more nuts left? What happens when he becomes too greedy and wants more…he gets stuck…again.
Really, how important are THOSE nuts, can’t he look somewhere else for nuts?
I’m working on and learning to understand detachment.

When everything is going well in our lives, we feel strong and positive, we're healthy and inspired. When we're happy and in love, it's effortless to appreciate the discussions regarding detachment; however when we're faced with loss, anguish, and/or failure, it looks much more interesting and then becomes a salvation that can move us out of misery and into serenity.
For me it’s the fear that is stopping me from moving forward. I imagine a different life, one without the drama. I pause as I write this and think about how maybe it’s the drama I enjoy???

Inevitably, attachment can lead to suffering and detachment can lead to freedom; Or like I learned in the Bhagavad-Gita “When a man dwells in his mind on the object of sense, attachment to them is produced. From attachment springs desire and from desire comes anger." This again brings me back to the nuts and how the monkey probably got really pissed off when he couldn’t have the nuts….been there…done that! Ok sorry, enough with the nuts.
We all have our own journey to live, our own karmic debts and lessons to be learned. This is especially hard to detach from when it’s a lost love, a child, a family member because not only are we attached, but emotionally invested and ultimately it becomes a part of us, it’s who we think we ARE.
So instead of letting desire and anger get the best of us, we can learn to take one day at a time practicing the art of detachment, and surrendering ourselves to what is.

Baby steps, 5 of them actually...

1. Acknowledgement: The first step is actually realizing and understanding what you’re going through…and LET yourself go through it. Allow yourself to cry, scream, sit in silence, but actually allow the FEELING come to the surface.
This doesn’t just mean JUST recognizing the thoughts and feelings, but actually FEELING them and breathe through it.

2. Self Inquiry: Once you’ve acknowledged and felt those feelings, it’s a matter of tuning inwards and allowing those scars to show themselves. It about acknowledgment, but this time don’t let it get to you. It’s finding the middle ground to be able to be beside them without having those feelings have such an effect on you. Seek guidance from where ever you want and can, and ask to be healed.

3. Processing: This is the part when you can reflect on the journey you just went through (or have been going through) and pick out the positives regardless of how it all turned out. I truly believe we’re all here to learn lessons…sometimes it takes a few tries before we actually learn it.

4. Inspiration: Without processing we tend to sometimes become depressed because of the loss we have experienced. We feel we have lost control of our lives. Obviously allowing ourselves to mourn as well as ample time to move through the process at our own rate. Once we can get through the processing stage we can allow the creative juices to flow, the positive energy to release back into our system and give ourselves permission to get excited about starting fresh again. This is when you will feel most inspired to get out there again.

5. Freedom: you know you have reached full detachment when you can allow yourself to think about the things you’ve lost, AND what you desire without having it affect your wellbeing. “I feel a weight being lifted off my chest” Have you ever heard this phrase? This is the feeling of detachment. Nothing holding you down, nothing keeping you locked up.

I’ve gone through these steps many times through different stages of my life. I’ve even gone through them in the same circumstance…more than twice. Nowadays I tend to skip past the first step as I am already quite “aware” and go straight to the “Processing” part. What NEW lessons have I learned? Has anything changed? Will anything change? And most importantly will I be happier and fulfilled if everything changed back to the way it use to be? After the last question I usually jump straight to FREEDOM…as I already know my answers. I guess sometimes a check in is nice too.

I wrote this blog as recently I’ve had to go through these stages, again. I was also lucky enough to meet a young inspiring woman who I believe was brought into my life for a reason, at the least a great friend to practice yoga with. I still find it amazing that the universe does that sort of thing. I’m dedicating this blog to her and hoping she’ll also find peace and happiness in her journey as well.

“Kind nice attractive lady talks about her yoga class….and I come from behind, bag their heads and drag them into the studio”

TEAMWORK!

Thursday, October 7, 2010

NEW Planet Workout Poster.



Thank you to Matthew Campanile for ALL your help, inspiration, guidance and most of all support.

check out http://www.planetworkout.net/ for more information and follow me on Facebook @ http://www.facebook.com/?sk=2361831622#!/group.php?gid=131766196852958

OH how I LOVE sweater weather.

This Thanksgiving I really do have a LOT of to grateful for. I really do make sure I remember to be thankful every day of my life because I’m alive and well and that’s really a LOT compared to other people and places in this world.

I’ve come a long way; in my career, my yoga, and especially with myself. A friend made the comment the other day “You made it!” I laughed and responded, “Getting there” Al though I’ve accomplished a lot and really have received a lot of the things I’ve wanted and asked for, I’m not finished yet. Like I said I’m very grateful for everything I’ve done as they have only brought me closer to accomplishing my new set of goals.

Remember to be thankful each day of your life. The little things DO really matter! Tell your friends and family how much you love them and how grateful you are that they’re in your life. Give your pets extra hugs and kisses; spend some time throwing a ball for taking them for a nice long walk. Donate your time, clothing or food to those less fortunate than you, and wake up each day with a smile and thankful that you were given another day to spread your wings and fly.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

“Give us thankful hearts ... in this the season of Thy Thanksgiving. May we be thankful for health and strength, for sun and rain and peace. Let us seize the day and the opportunity and strive for that greatness of spirit that measures life not by its disappointments but by its possibilities, and let us ever remember that true gratitude and appreciation shows itself neither in independence nor satisfaction, but passes the gift joyfully on in larger and better form.” W.E.B. Du Bois

Monday, October 4, 2010

"Kali in the house"

Lately I’ve been really thinking about the last year. Mostly about the fact that it’s ONLY been a year since I moved back home and my life was transformed. Have all of these changes really only happened in a year?! Time really does move fast. I can’t believe how much has happened, how far I’ve become, everything I’ve accomplished, and EVERYTHING that’s changed! Although saying that, there are a few things that haven’t changed over the year as well.

Over this past weekend my parents moved out of the house I grew up in. 27 years of memories, parties, fights, laughter, love, happiness, sadness, holidays, family and friends. I stayed with them over the weekend, and slept in my “bedroom” for the very last time, and I left this morning saying goodbye to the best house ever. My mom reminded me that it’s not WHERE you live that makes “home” it’s who you’re with. I wish I had learned this about 2 years earlier. Then again I guess I DID have a lesson to learn, and everything really does happen for a reason.

Why are so many of us scared of change? Sometimes even repelling it so much we dig our heels into the ground and refuse to have it any other way. We suffer through each day of things not being what we think they “should” be. How do we get through it? Whether is be positive or negative, how can we make the transitions easier for ourselves?

I think we first have to take away the control, the fear, and the belief that it’s a negative thing. Change can be wonderful and very beneficial.
I was reminded of the goddess Kali by my roommate/Yogini Lindsey. “Kali is considered the goddess of time and change.” “Kali in the house!” is how Linds actually put it, which just made me smile, and really appreciate how great things really are. As ones spiritual devotee, Kali can be summoned to assist others appreciate the natural phases of birth and death.
Kali acts as a guide to help those in need to remember that change is required because from endings come new beginnings.

If change wasn’t a part of my life, I wouldn’t have experienced the love, the happiness, and even the heartbreaking sadness. Without ALL of these, I wouldn’t be where I am today, accomplished, proud, knowledgeable and successful!
The universe will never give you more than you can handle, so welcome change with open arms, no need to fear when something is taken away from you, or leaves your life, it just means that there’s more room for something more incredible to come along.

Friday, October 1, 2010

Ending your practice but not your awareness.

I’ve always heard about Savasana or Corps Pose being that hardest posture to “get”.

This is how we typically end each practice. Lying on your back, shoulder tucked onto your back, palms facing up, and body....RELAXED! It’s easier said than done. I personally LOVE this posture, but that's also been a learning experience and I've had to do just that, learn and practice.
All that’s being asked of you is to just LAY there, LET GO, breath, and surrender your body, mind and soul for only about 3 minutes, in my classes that is. To some this can be the longest 3 minutes of their life as they have SO much to do when they leave the studio, especially being at a gym. This is the difference between teaching at a studio and teaching inside of a gym. When people come to the studio, their main focus is yoga, and that’s it. When people take a yoga class at a gym, I feel it’s more of an enhancement to their workout. I hear a lot of “I just need to stretch” but unfortunately not a lot of feeling the need to be less stressed, more focused and present. This is fine as they may not know what it means to feel these types of things and ultimately...that’s where I come in.

Yesterday night during my class of 10 people (AWESOME!) I themed the class on the breath. Breathing through the postures like breathing through life when it puts you in a tough position. At the end after I got them into Savasana, I read the poem I posted last year called Breath is Enough-By Robert William Service. I let that sit, or in this case lay with them while they relaxed and enjoyed Savasana. I remember two of the girls in the back who had never taken a yoga class before. Their heads popped up and they looked at each other as if to say “are we done??!!” I continued to guide them through Savasana, letting them know it was ok to relax, let go and surrender each part of their body deeper into the mat. They had full permission to just lay there and do nothing.

I feel having a hectic mind is an outcome of pushing too hard in yoga postures, concentrating too much on what you must and mustn’t do, not breathing through the posture trusting yourself. Then there’s its opposite; a deep sleep during corpse pose, day dreaming or dreaming and letting your thoughts take over because dreaming is often way easier then surrendering to a posture. While sleeping seems to be the most ordinary occurrence throughout this pose; sleeping keeps us from the depth and refinement of Savasana. I am one of the world’s biggest day dreamers and I am NOT saying there is anything wrong with daydreaming or even sleeping, it’s just that those states are considered unconscious; and that makes it’s much easier for one to dream than to surrender. Without even knowing it you might even actively engage the mind's eye in order to avoid the release one might have during Savasana.
It’s about finding that sweet spot right in the middle between sleep and effort, observing rather than chasing, and letting go rather than holding onto. This to me…is Savasana.
So is that it? Are we scared to LET ourselves LET GO? Are we worried that we might let go of something that we may think is holding us together? We live in a world full of distractions that we tend to repulse; Most of the time by pushing things deep inside us and not surrendering to them. This isn’t usually done on purpose but more so because we’re so busy we don’t think we have time, not even understanding that we actually don’t even HAVE to deal with it, just don't engage. When finally given the chance to rest, all of these feeling arise, our mind races and we feel we’re forced to deal with them, trying to figure out a solution to everything that VERY moment. When in Corpse Pose, if we're given the permission to let ourselves “briefly die” or “a small death, every moment, every day,” says Pattabhi Jois. We allow ourselves to experience the world as it is in that very moment. Learning from this example allows us to suspend those distractions and surrender to the feelings that we have been avoiding. This surrender gives way to spaciousness within the mind, body and soul. When one practices this way there is space enough for everything, especially love and appreciation.

I am too still learning to let go in Savasana, as well as other parts of my life. Little by little I have actually extended the life of my “small death” learning to come back to the breath each time my mind wanders and tries to deal with things that I’ve usually already let go of…or so I thought. It’s one of the most important parts of my practice. If I find myself too much in my head, I turn my focus to being grateful. I figure if I can’t relax my mind enough for the time being I might as well use it to focus on being thankful, and releasing some positive energy.
If you find yourself getting distracted or agitated, you can always come back to this basis. Just undo, unwind, breathe, get out of the way of those thoughts and JUST observe.

I read an amazing line today “When you roll out of Savasana, do not let Savasana roll out of you.” -Brad's Iyengar Yoga Notebook

Thanks Brad! If this were facebook…The “LIKE” button would be pressed! ;)

Thursday, September 30, 2010

Sweat & Smiles

HOW grateful am I? Every night I walk out of my classes at Planet Workout with the BIGGEST smile and my heart filled with excitement and love. Can I tell you how good it feels to actually have a class full of people who WANT to learn something new?
I started my first week with three and have tripled my numbers since then. I STILL haven’t even advertised yet. Something I am working on though. I have 4 regular students that have come to every class and getting to know them and hear about how much they love my classes has really been a blessing. This is truly where I shine and I am VERY thankful I stuck with it and never gave up.

Each one of my classes is different, working on a particular theme and/or muscle. There’s a big difference between 3 and 10 people in classes. Last night I had a lot more people and found myself getting up to assist more than moving through the postures with them. I haven’t really decided what I will continue to do when it comes to guiding or assisting. A lot of my students are new and I find it more time consuming to assist them through posture since they’re not that flexible yet. I’m trying not to contradict myself when I say “not flexible enough” as I stress to my students there in NO destination when it comes to a yoga posture, but you really do have to pick your battles. I do make sure while guiding them through the flow I make sure they know what they’re “supposed to be feeling, where they should feel it, and how to move deeper if it is available to them.

My favourite part is talking to each of my students after each class, especially the new ones. I continually get the same feedback, and the same smiling, relaxed but energized faces. Since I’ve started I’ve heard a lot of “this muscle was sore and tight and you completely relaxed and loosed it up” I put it right back onto the student and make sure they’re aware it was all them. I was merely there to direct and guide them. They feel proud and they have every right to. Yoga can be challenging, and in the end very rewarding.
I’m still working on trying to drop the stigma around yoga for men. I spoke to this one guy yesterday who I introduced myself to when I started there 3 months ago. He hasn’t been to my class yet...but I see him continually looking in on my classes. I like to think he’s interested...in yoga! I stopped him yesterday to mention he STILL hasn’t attended any of my classes yet. He told me “I don’t think I can, it hurts!” I asked “what hurts?!?!” He said...”YOGA!” We talked for a bit because I HAD to make sure he had a clear understanding of what yoga is, why it would be great for him and why is should never HURT. He said he’s try to come to my class tonight. I might have to rethink my flow as I had a pretty tough one planned that actually branched from Bikrams 26 postures...which is weird because I personally did not enjoy Bikrams yoga as much as the others I’ve tried. I guess I'm ready to change it up.

Either way I know tonight will be another satisfying night of yoga, smiles and a room FULL of wonderful keen students...my students!

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

180 degrees

What an incredible week so far!

I had the privilege of meeting with my amazing Aunt, Irene again last Sunday. As you’ve probably read before, we have a lot in common, our views are similar and we definitely “GET” each other. Talking to her is simple for me because she gets me...and “it”. Most of the time I don’t even have to explain; she understands. This is refreshing for me as I delve deeper into myself, the universe and world around me. Understandably...a lot of questions have come up.
This last Sunday we touched a lot on the power of your own thoughts, emotions and especially your own words. It’s funny how I arrive there confused, anxious and sometimes upset because of these feelings and always without a doubt end up leaving happy, excited, somewhat overwhelmed...but calm. I think every visit I’ve cried, but laughed immediately after because I KNOW things can change, and I believe it. I’ve witnessed it happen!

One of the main focuses for my future that we wanted to work on was my yoga business. I was still at working at the gym Planet Workout, putting in my hrs weekly, but still not getting the results I wanted. I know what I had to do, but something was missing. I knew I needed some guidance and ultimately a little reassurance. I make a conscious effort to change my thinking, and just be grateful with how far I’ve come.
Last night my good friend Tania came to my class. She attends regularly, and she’s a BLAST to practice with. She’s confident, strong and always has a smile on her face. Practicing with her tends to be more playful and experimental as I know she’s very open and easy going. I try a lot of new things out with her because she’s always willing and excited. Last night I told her we were working towards inversions, and I would have her upside down by the end of the class. Half way through our class I had a woman come in asking about the yoga and if I would be ok with her participating for the rest of the class so she could try it out. I gladly welcomed her in. We had met before when I first started teaching at Planet workout, and I hadn’t seen her since. I was excited she was interested again. I do have to admit it caught me off guard as Tania and I had already been practicing for about 40 minutes and we’re very close to going upside down. I took a breath and moved forward combining a few more easy flows and postures that would allow the new woman to become more relaxed, flexible and aware, and ultimately allowing Tania to further increase her flexibility. They both did amazing, and the combined energy of these two strong, excited, passionate women made everything flow together nicely. I don’t think they noticed when I paused and had to take a minute to think. Towards the end of the flow I still wanted to guide Tania into an L Hang at the wall, but wasn’t sure how my new student would take to this. I was playing with the thoughts of coming on too strong, and her not wanting to take my classes because she thought they might be too difficult? I made sure my new student was comfortable and gave her the option to watch or participate if she felt comfortable enough. Surprisingly she jumped right into it. Both Tania and my new student got over their fear of the unknown and got into L Hang, or more so a Handstand prep. They both said out loud “I can’t believe I was able to get up” I was very proud, and had to contain the excitement of wanting to explore more inversions.
The 3 of us spent a little time after class getting to know each other and talking about our fitness programs, schedules and life styles. We learned a lot about each other, and it gave me more of a perception of what I needed to change about my yoga classes. Tania and I both left feeling grateful, stretched, proud, and happy as my new student’s energy level was so uplifting and joyful.
Afterwards, Tania and I went to see a movie. I’m the type of person who gets very annoyed by the other people who are on their phones during the movie. Unexpectedly, my phone buzzed (I did put it on silent at least) I received and email. Usually, I would just wait until the end of the movie to check my phone...but something inside me made me check it right then and there. I’m surprised I could take my eyes off the screen as it was a movie starring Drew Barrymore who I absolutely LOVE!
I checked the email and it was from the owners of Planet Workout. They wanted to hire me on, and put me on the payroll...STARTING TOMORROW! I basically had to use ALL my power NOT to jump up and scream. I showed Tania the email and we sat there shaking, giggling trying to share a very quiet freak out session. Disappointingly I’m not sure what happened in the movie as all I could think about what this amazing opportunity and the fact that I KNEW if I stuck with it, gave it my all, and believed in myself...everything would eventually pay off!

THIS is what I have been waiting for, and now it’s here! My hours and days will change, and I’ll be able to implement an actual schedule, workshops, and generate an actual consistent clientele. I am so excited to construct my weekly classes and bring something new and exciting to Planet Workout.

I am ecstatic with the way things are going and I am continually grateful for all I have been given.

Thank you!

Monday, September 13, 2010

Wide Open Spaces

WAY too much has happened to me lately to NOT write a blog about it. This won’t be the “usual” format...really I just need to release a lot of information. If you’ve followed my blog, you’ll notice one is missing. I NEEDED to delete it as it was having negative consequences on my life. I remember writing it and feeling good about getting certain things off my chest. Secretly maybe I wanted the attention? At the time I felt relieved, but in the back of my mind, I knew something was still wrong. I had put this out to the universe, and not only put it out there...I put it in writing. That blog was SO negative, and I had just made a concrete pact with the universe...what was I thinking? I guess I just wasn’t.

Well although it wasn’t the greatest ideas...I am still thankful I wrote it and posted it. I learned quite a few valuable lessons from putting it out there, and it just reinforced my belief system.

So I unfortunately sprained my ankle, then contracted blood poisoning and Group B Strep in the other foot. I’ve heard that issues dealing with your feet have to do with a fear of moving forward. I realized everyone who read this blog would ultimately end of feeling sorry for me and send THAT out into the universe too. I KNOW I’m stronger than this, and didn’t need pity from anyone. Why did I want people to feel sorry for me?

I’m doing GREAT! I’ll prove it!

I completed the yoga course. I went out and got a job teaching my passion at a gym ALL BY MYSELF. I’ve networked and made some amazing connections because of it. I’ve learned more about yoga, my confidence has grown with teaching and within myself, and I’m getting better at it every day.
I got to move into the house with Lindsey and Shannon. I was given a car from my parents. I have an amazing job with an amazing pension and benefits. I am able to pay all my bills on time. I am able to go out with friends whenever I want. I have the luxury of going to the gym and working on deepening my own practice 4 times a week without having to pay for it.
I have amazing and supportive family and friends who constantly prove that they will always be there and love me.

WHY AM I COMPLAINING!?!

Just because certain things weren’t happening to me the same time it was for other doesn’t mean they wouldn’t. I had more to learn before I was ready for that stage in my life. I have never doubted that it wouldn’t happen, why was I in so much of a rush? I will appreciate the stages I’m living now. I will be grateful that I’m able to still able to do the things I’m doing. I am excited that I have the time to devote to what I want to accomplish.

Driving to work today I actually realized that over the last year I have gotten EVERYTHING I have asked for. What’s stopping me now for continuing to achieve my dreams, accomplish my goals, and at the end of the day GET MORE!?!
Every night before I go to bed I say thank you for all the GREAT things that happened that day. I have now learned to also be thankful for the not so great things because in the end, they taught me something. I learned something new, and for that always be grateful.

I’m really looking forward to the next couple of months. I had a wonderful (as always) conversation with my Aunt who planted some really amazing ideas in regards to advertising my yoga and ultimately building my clientele. I am really excited to move forward with these ideas and see what I can accomplish and accumulate.
I am going to make more of an effort to write this blog more often as it is my way of connecting with the universe around me.

As I was driving to work thinking about writing this blog, I had the question of what to name it? I really do feel my titles have been the souls of my blog and ultimately can explain my reasoning in just a few words. I recently found an old CD that my brother had made me about 12 yrs ago. I was listening to is and Wide Open Spaces came on. Well, this song pretty much made me laugh out loud and cry at the same time, especially this part

“As her folks drive away, her dad yells, "Check the oil!"
Mom stares out the window and says, "I'm leaving my girl"
She said, "It didn't seem like that long ago"
When she stood there and let her own folks know, she needed,
WIDE OPEN SPACES!”

In a nutshell!

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Expanding...and THANKFUL!

http://www.planetworkout.net/yoga.html

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Update....LONG OVERDUE...

I have really neglected my blog. Obviously not on purpose...life has just gotten VERY busy with my new yoga practice/studio, my best friend got married, living on my own...and to be honest, it’s all moving SO fast. It’s only when I stop to take a breath and really evaluate my surroundings (which I feel I need to do more often) is when I come back to my blog. I’ve promised myself I would write...I knew when I was ready again I would.
Planet workout is still in the early stages. I was a little discouraged at the beginning to say the least. I wasn’t getting anyone coming in. It took me by surprise. This was more difficult than I had thought. With the help and support of family and friends I was able to spread the word around the city and slowly and surly more people seemed interested and started to show up. I’ve had a LOT of support from all my friends and family, and especially those who came to take my class.
I’ve been trying to extinguish the stigma around yoga within the gym. A lot of men are there, working out, lifting weights and working on getting BIGGER. I want them to know how much yoga would benefit them in terms of flexibility, range of motion, stamina and getting over those plateaus. I didn’t realize how much EGO I had to break down...it’s still a work in progress. It’s not their fault either...when you don’t have the knowledge and support how can you really feel comfortable opening yourself up to something that new and different.
It’s a work in progress, and I am determined to get more people, especially men into my classes. I’m working on a Men’s Only yoga class, Body Building Yoga and a few more classes that will help people understand that yoga isn’t JUST about peace, breathing, and meditation....there’s SO much more!
I still teach a few times a month at Kula which is a dream come true for me. My class size at PW is about 3-4 people while Kula is close to about 50. It’s a very different experience and I’m thankful that I’ve had so much practice at PW and feel much more confident while teaching a room full of amazing yogi’s at Kula.
I haven’t lost touch with my close group of girls from Training. I live with two of them and it’s been wonderful. Lots of laughter, yoga, heart to heart talks. Lind’s and Shan actually take the time out of their day to see how I’m doing, ask how my day and life is going and genuinely care. It’s been really nice and easy for me to get settled. It can still be lonely at times, as I took for granted just having people in the home....however I can’t lie, I like having the time to myself.
I’m not doing as much yoga as I use to after the teacher training, and I really do miss it. I mostly miss those 5 hr practices on our weekend retreats. I think it’s only because summer has been so busy with new and exciting events that I haven’t had the time. We’re coming close to the end of summer now and I’m planning to get right back into it +more. Really focusing my time and energy on my teaching, guiding and especially my own self practices...something I never thought I would enjoy, but now realize how much I love and can’t live without.
I was fortunate enough to meet up with a remarkable young woman yesterday names Brittany. She was given my name by a mutual friend, Krista. Krista and I grew up together where we had a cottage ever summer. Brittany came to my yoga class yesterday and we went out for tea afterwards. What an amazing woman, and her stories are even better. She’s so inspiring and I really look forward to getting to know her better and hopefully working towards mutual aspirations in the future.
Last night made me really appreciate how small the world really is, and how people really do come into our lives for a reason. I’m pretty sure I’ve met, or at least seen Brittany while I was little...who knew that we would reconnect in the future after BOTH our lives changed so much. I am grateful and excited for all there is to come.

Monday, June 28, 2010

MY biggest cheerleader!

With today being my FIRST day teaching @ Planet Workout I am VERY excited...and as the hours count down, a little more nervouse then when I first woke up this morning. Now that I'm teaching Monday evenings @ PW, this means I wont be able to meet Simps for yoga like I have been for the past month. This is bitter sweet because I enjoyed practicing/teaching with her so much. She is very proud and supportive of me and I know we'll have time again in the future to meet up.
She wrote me this today on my FB page and I was touched more than words could express. I love you Simps and Thank you for teaching ME so much. :)

"With two children, life can be quite busy. Yoga with Devon helps me take a breath, and focus on the present. It helps to relax, calm and re-energize me for the rest of my day/week. Having taken Devon's class for only a few weeks, I have noticed, I am stronger, more flexible and more willing to push myself. This is not to say yoga is easy, especially not Devon's classes! Devon will push you to hold a pose till you want to cry...and then ask you to hold it for one breath longer. When you do it though, she is your biggest cheerleader. She will ask you to "shine brighter" and to "melt your heart", and will help you become aware of the way your muscles work together. Devon is an extremely compassionate and knowledgeable individual and will listen to your needs and help you make yoga work for you."
Seemen Muqtadir.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Planet Workout

So I was talking to my friends from yoga and the thought came up to look elsewhere for a teaching position as the positions we wanted just weren’t available that moment. I had put myself out there on Craig’s List, kijiji, websites and emailed/called EVERY yoga studio I could that didn’t take an hr out of my day to get to. This unfortunately took Toronto out of the picture as I think the commute would have just added more stress to the equation.

The thought of sending in my resume to gyms was put into my head more than once. Maybe that was a sign? I just never thought about a gym as i knew a lot of gyms had their own “flows” and I would have had to take THEIR course which really didn’t align with my belief of what yoga is and should be. I did finally give in and sent my resume to the gym I use to belong to, Planet Workout, Mississauga. I knew they had Pilates, spin, kickboxing and from what I was told by a few members they did have a yoga class, but it wasn’t that good. I decided to write them a letter explaining what I could offer them and their members.
I received a call from Frank, the owner and manager of Planet Workout the next day saying he really wanted to meet with me to discuss the possibility of putting together a yoga class. I can’t begin to tell you HOW excited I was to hear from him, AND get the chance to meet with him and talk about MY PASSION. We set the date up for the next Monday.

After my amazing weekend reconnecting with friends, meeting new people, and having a great time celebrating life, I couldn’t wait until Monday...that’s a first! I was excited and knew I had this in the bag! I just had to be myself....I AM YOGA! I have so much to offer, share and want to share that with everyone. I want people to FEEL what I feel EVERYDAY! Love, happiness and enlightenment!

I met with Frank at the gym in his office. We talked for about an hour. He asked what I wanted to do and what I was looking for. My goals for now and for the future, and ultimately what I can offer his gym members that no one else has offered before. I was confident enough, and I know I am worth it so I didn’t really have trouble finding an answer to his questions. It was simple...share my love of yoga with the world. I am walking PROOF of the amazing positive qualities yoga has to offer and I promise if you give me at least an hr just a few times...you’ll fall in love. There is just too much to gain and can help anyone with just about anything. At the end of the day, if you leave my class with just sweat on your shirt...at least you’ve motivated your body, helped strengthen your heart and increased your blood flow...that’s good enough for now.
Frank is giving me two weeks to build a clientele that will help sustain a steady income. To him it’s not going to be worth it if only a handful of people are coming to my class...I don’t think that way at all as I would be 100% happy with one person coming to my class. I guess I do have to look at this from a business perspective as well though. Frank is currently making me a poster and I have already made my face book page. 58 members so far and growing.

I’m really excited about this as I get my own room, my own area to make my own. He told me I’m allowed to do what I want with it. Posters, flowers, candles. I am overjoyed and a little overwhelmed. I start Monday June 28th at 7pm as well as Tuesday. I would like to increase my hours on the weekends as well. The great thing about this yoga class is that you DON’T have to be a member to take the class; this alone gives people the freedom without the pressure of signing any contracts.
My flows are planned with basic intermediate and advanced poses. There will be something for everyone. I look forward to pushing people to their boundaries and really showing them what their body can do! Smiling faces and laughter when people go into a pose they never thought was possible. Relaxed and enlightened minds bodies and souls after they experience YOGA!

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

My dreams are coming TRUE!

http://www.facebook.com/?ref=home#!/group.php?gid=131766196852958

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

"Anyway"

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self centered;
Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;
Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;
Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your God;
It was never between you and them anyway.


-this version is credited to Mother Teresa

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

"One small step..."

I’m still meeting every Monday with Simps and continuing with our one on one yoga practice. The last few times we’ve gotten together we’ve done a full 60-75 min flows which leaves us both a sweaty mess! It’s been awesome. I really appreciate how Simps is very open and honest before, during and after our practice. She’s able to tell me where she can or can’t feel things and something where she feels them too much. This is a fantastic teaching strategy for me because I able to stop and think for a moment, without having to worry about the pressure of 20 other students waiting for me to continue.
Simp’s has definitely come a long way. I noticed this for the first time last week when we went from down dog to crescent lunge. When stepping her one leg in to meet her hands at the front for high lunge, she would always stop half way and have to physically lift and bring her leg to the front due to the lack of flexibility. When we tried it again this week, she did it with ease. I had to stop make sure she noticed and acknowledged as it was a very big step for her...no pun intended. I was really proud of her.
This week I wrote down a few poses I wanted to make sure I practice with her as we haven’t done them yet like Half moon, Trikonasana, Warrior 3 and Hero. I appreciate the fact that Simps is so willing that she’ll go right back into the pose if she’s fallen out, and won’t move on until she’s grasped the concept of it, or at least the integration.
Simps and I have both learned a lot about yoga, and about each other. I look forward to next Monday when we work on Handstands/inversions...or at least “getting there” We’re going to be doing a lot of wall work in order to prep. I think she looked excited when I told her.

Monday, June 7, 2010

Broke, but not broken.

My friend Amanda was teaching her first class yesterday in Burlington. I was super excited for her as I had no doubt she would be amazing. I went to assist with her and ultimately be there for moral support. I arrived in Burlington and went to put on my amethyst mala that would not only keep me calm, but hopefully give off the vibrations to Amanda and the rest of the students in the room as well.

As I put the mala around my neck and went to grab the rest of my things I started to hear what sounds like rain the pavement. As I looked down, I noticed my beautiful necklace had broken right at the crystal and the beads were falling to the ground. I just stood there...in disbelief. Can these break!?! Then I couldn’t help but think what this represented....What could THIS mean!?!

I put it all behind me for now as I had to concentrate of being present for Amanda. I didn’t even tell her what had happened to my necklace.
This morning as I got into my car I saw my Mala sitting there in the little bag with all the beads. I guess I really did tuck that away deep and I had totally forgotten about it. There was a lot of excitement yesterday with a lot of my very close friends/roomies doing their first classes.
After I emailed Diana to tell her the bad news and if there was any way she could fix it; I went onto Google and for fun, typed in “broken mala” to my surprise...It DOES have a meaning.

I found a few different meanings/stories:

“When your mala breaks, that means you've learned something. You've made a breakthrough.”

“Not a bad omen, at all. Usually, it's a GOOD omen. Often means that some karma has been released. What KIND of karma is determined by where it broke (between what beads?)”

“The cording or wire used to string the Mala will eventually break with use over time. Even though this is a natural process, one can also see this as a positive expression of the law of cause and effect, creating good karma. The more you use the Mala to pray and recite mantra the sooner it wears out. However, this is not to suggest one shouldn't treat it well. When it eventually breaks, this is a constant reminder of the Lord Buddha's principal teaching on Impermanence...in summary, "all things are subject to dissolution, decay and change." In addition, the breakage of a mala can also serve to protect you in times of potential danger. Malas have been known to "take the hit" on your behalf so you are protected.”

I’ve asked Diana to please see if she’s able to restring it as I was able to collect most of the beads that fell off.

I take this as a great omen. One consisting of change, development and resolution. This past week has been a major rollercoaster for me in regards to my feelings and emotions. I’ve had more than one breakdown. I’ve moved out of my house for a second time and I’ve completed my Yoga teacher training course. Among other changes in my life that I’ve felt at the time were awful and discouraging, I now look at them as a release and movement forward. This is a new beginning for me, a new life, and a new chance!

108

On a mala, or set of mantra counting beads, there are normally 108 beads, or some fraction of that number (54, 27, 18, and 9)

The question often occurs: Why are there 108 beads on a mala?

Below are some of the many reasons that have been given for having 108 beads on a mala, as well as a few other points of curiosity. None of these reasons are being promoted here as more or less true than the others. However, you may notice that 108 is a relative road map of reality in general, and the human in particular.
Apart from of the meaning of 108, it is important that if a mala is used to count mantras and the mantra be remembered with sincerity, devotion, feeling, and full attention.


9 times 12: Both of these numbers have been said to have spiritual significance in many traditions. 9 times 12 is 108. Also, 1 plus 8 equals 9. That 9 times 12 equals 108.

Powers of 1, 2, and 3 in math: 1 to 1st power=1; 2 to 2nd power=4 (2x2); 3 to 3rd power=27 (3x3x3). 1x4x27=108

Harshad number: 108 is a Harshad number, which is an integer divisible by the sum of its digits (Harshad is from Sanskrit, and means "great joy")

Desires: There are said to be 108 earthly desires in mortals.

Lies: There are said to be 108 lies that humans tell.

Delusions: There are said to be 108 human delusions or forms of ignorance.

Heart Chakra: The chakras are the intersections of energy lines, and there are said to be a total of 108 energy lines converging to form the heart chakra. One of them, sushumna leads to the crown chakra, and is said to be the path to Self-realization.

Sanskrit alphabet: There are 54 letters in the Sanskrit alphabet. Each has masculine and feminine, shiva and shakti. 54 times 2 is 108, 5+4=9

Pranayama: If one is able to be so calm in meditation as to have only 108 breaths in a day, enlightenment will come.

Upanishads: Some say there are 108 Upanishads, texts of the wisdom of the ancient sages.

Sri Yantra: On the Sri Yantra there are marmas where three lines intersect, and there are 54 such intersections. Each intersections has masculine and feminine, shiva and shakti qualities. 54 times 2 equals 108. Thus, there are 108 points that define the Sri Yantra as well as the human body.

Pentagon: The angle formed by two adjacent lines in a pentagon equals 108 degrees.

Marmas: Marmas or marmasthanas are like energy intersections called chakras, except have fewer energy lines converging to form them. There are said to be 108 marmas in the subtle body.

Time: Some say there are 108 feelings, with 36 related to the past, 36 related to the present, and 36 related to the future.

8 extra beads: In doing a practice of counting the number of repetitions of the mala, 100 are counted as completed. The remaining are said to cover errors or omissions. The 8 are also said to be an offering to God and Guru.

Chemistry: Interestingly, there are about 115 elements known on the periodic table of the elements. Most of those, around or higher than the number 100 only exist in the laboratory, and some for only thousandths of a second. The number that naturally exist on Earth is around 100.

Astrology: There are 12 constellations, and 9 arc segments called namshas or chandrakalas. 9 times 12 equals 108. Chandra is moon, and kalas are the divisions within a whole.

River Ganga: The sacred River Ganga spans a longitude of 12 degrees (79 to 91), and a latitude of 9 degrees (22 to 31). 12 times 9 equals 108.

Planets and Houses: In astrology, there are 12 houses and 9 planets. 12 times 9 equals 108.

Goddess names: There are said to be 108 Indian goddess names.

Gopis of Krishna: In the Krishna tradition, there were said to be 108 gopis or maid servants of Krishna.

1, 0, and 8: Some say that 1 stands for God or higher Truth, 0 stands for emptiness or completeness in spiritual practice, and 8 stands for infinity or eternity.

Sun and Earth: The diameter of the Sun is 108 times the diameter of the Earth. The distance from the Sun to the Earth is 108 times the diameter of the Sun.

Moon and Earth: The average distance of the Moon from the Earth is 108 times the diameter of the Moon.

Silver and the moon: In astrology, the metal silver is said to represent the moon. The atomic weight of silver is 108.

Numerical scale: The 1 of 108, and the 8 of 108, when added together equals 9, which is the number of the numerical scale, i.e. 1, 2, 3 ... 10, etc., where 0 is not a number.

Meditations: Some say there are 108 styles of meditation.

Breath: Tantra estimates the average number of breaths per day at 21,600, of which 10,800 are solar energy, and 10,800 are lunar energy. Multiplying 108 by 100 is 10,800. Multiplying 2 x 10,800 equals 21,600.

Paths to God: Some suggest that there are 108 paths to God.

Smaller divisions: The number 108 is divided, such as in half, third, quarter, or twelfth, so that some malas have 54, 36, 27, or 9 beads.

Hinduism: 108 is said to refer to the number of Hindu deities. Some say that each of the deities has 108 names.

Islam: The number 108 is used in Islam to refer to God.

Jain: In the Jain religion, 108 are the combined virtues of five categories of holy ones, including 12, 8, 36, 25, and 27 virtues respectively.

Sikh: The Sikh tradition has a mala of 108 knots tied in a string of wool, rather than beads.

Buddhism: Some Buddhists carve 108 small Buddhas on a walnut for good luck. Some ring a bell 108 times to celebrate a new year. There are said to be 108 virtues to cultivate and 108 defilements to avoid.

Chinese: The Chinese Buddhists and Taoists use a 108 bead mala, which is called su-chu, and has three dividing beads, so the mala is divided into three parts of 36 each. Chinese astrology says that there are 108 sacred stars.

Stages of the soul: Said that Atman, the human soul or center goes through 108 stages on the journey.

Meru: This is a larger bead, not part of the 108. It is not tied in the sequence of the other beads. It is the quiding bead, the one that marks the beginning and end of the mala.

Dance: There are 108 forms of dance in the Indian traditions.

Praiseworthy souls: There are 108 qualities of praiseworthy souls.

First man in space: The first manned space flight lasted 108 minutes, and was on April 12, 1961 by Yuri Gagarin, a Soviet cosmonaut.


P.S...In numerology I'm #9...and I just happen to be in my 9th year...gave me shivers!

Tiny Devotions


If you remember back to a blog I did about when my friend Amanda and I attended the Tuesday night class and were awarded with meeting Diana, a yoga teacher who introduced us to the world of Chakra’s. Diana was VERY inspiring to me. Not only because of her amazing unique class, but as I became friends with her...and yes I’ll admit it, creeped her facebook, I realized what an amazing woman she was...and SO young. She’s only one year younger than I am...but the amount she has accomplished was astonishing.
Diana has completed an Honors’ degree in English and Cultural Studies and Critical Theory and a post-graduate degree in Law…she has also lived in Australia, and travelled to Bali…oh ya, and an incredible yoga teacher. As we talked (creeped…whatever) more I got to learn about her passion for Mala’s and the crystals that she made with them. For those who haven’t heard of a Mala before…here’s a little behind the scenes story of these stunning necklaces/meditation tools.

It is a tool used to keep your mind on the meditation practice. Malas are generally made from different materials such as tulsi (basil) wood, sandal wood, rudraksh seeds or crystal. Each type of material has certain properties which subtly affect the subconscious mind of the practitioner.

Why use the Mala?

Meditation can be quite a tricky practice because the mind is like a naughty child. By its very nature, the mind tends to wander off during the meditation practice. If ones energy is low at the time of meditation, falling asleep can result. If the energy is too high, fantasy and distraction become the barriers. At such times, the mala provides the much needed anchor.
The mala beads are moved in rhythm with the breath and the mantra, so that both-sleep as well as excessive mental distraction-are prevented by this action upon the beads.

For wearing: A personal mala is a wonderful accessory to meditation, which when used regularly with a personal mantra, absorbs the vibrations of the practice. It becomes like a close friend or a comfortable piece of clothing!

How to Use?

The mala is traditionally held in the right hand and used in two ways -
In one method, the mala is hanging between the thumb and the ring (third) finger. The middle (second) finger is used to rotate the mala by one bead towards oneself with each repetition of the mantra.

In the other method, the mala is hanging on the middle finger, with the thumb used to rotate the mala just as explained - one bead at a time.
Either way, the index finger is never used to touch the mala.
The practice begins at the summit bead (sumeru) and continues around the loop until the summit is reached again. The summit bead is never passed over. So if you plan to do more than 1 round, the mala is turned around to proceed again in the reverse direction. When the beads are passed over the index finger your Karmas are brought to you so unless you want to hasten your karma don't use the index finger
When the beads are passed over the ring finger calmness is attained. When using the mala it is important that you turn around at the Guru Bead and go the other direction. Never cross the Guru Bead.

The guru bead has many positions of importance...when chanting and meditating we use malas to keep count of our recitations. At the point of getting to the guru bead one must stop, and turn around to continue counting in the opposite direction...why? well...when one meets the guru bead he must remember the guru-disciple relationship and strive for a closer bond and union. A guru bead also reflects the awareness that one must have in every aspect of life, a moment to reflect on the importance of your chanting, a time to reflect on your intentions and motive for sitting in meditation. A reverence of the guru...you approach and return to counting.

Diana told me about her mala beads and website called Tiny Devotions. Her mala’s were beautifully made with specific crystals. Clients could pick their beads/crystals depending on what they wanted the mala for or what they themselves needed.
I knew right away I wanted one, and I wanted it to be made with Amethyst. I chose amethyst especially for its concentration qualities during meditation. This was obviously something I had been working towards and knew this would only improve my connection. I asked Diana if she could make me one and within a few days it was finished. It was made with the beautiful rudraksha seeds from the rudraksha trees. They are sacred seeds only grown in a few remote locations in the world. They are supposed to have a lot of healing and spiritual qualities. My crystal was a stunning big piece of amethyst. I also had a few beads of amethyst and a few pearls as well. I remember wearing it the night I got it during yoga and felt absolutely full of light throughout my practice. So many people commented on how gorgeous it was and where they could get one too.

Amethyst: Amethyst crystals brings energies of peace, balance, courage, tranquility, and inner strength. Amethyst stones can also have a calming effect. Amethyst is also here to teach us the lesson of humility, as it is willing to show the mind how to surrender at the altar of the self. Only by letting go of all that was believed to be real can the ultimate reality be known. It is an excellent stone for meditation or dream work, past life work, and general healing.

I wore it just about every time I practiced, meditated or just wanted to feel the amazing vibrations this mala evoked within me. I did wear this as a piece of jewelry sometimes because it was that beautiful, and the conversations it brought up between the people who saw me wearing it were fun in itself.

A few weeks ago I got to meet up with Diana and discuss a summer internship with Tiny Devotions. I was really excited to meet with her and see what doors this could possibly open up for the both of us. We met up in Oakville and she told me more about herself, her company Tiny Devotions, and he future goals. There was an instant connection between us as we had the same interests. She blew me away with her goals for herself, and her company. She is so inspiring to me and I couldn’t wait to join the team. I knew it was something that could help me network, learn something new and just have fun with MORE amazing friends. With Diana being so well organized and positive, I had no reason to doubt her or her intentions. I look forward to working more with Diana and Tiny Devotions helping her reach her business goals as I know she can help me reach my personal goals as well.

For more information about Tiny Devotions and Diana, PLEASE visit her amazing website. I have no uncertainty that you’ll find it just as beautiful as I did and feel the instant rapport we had between us. These make beautiful gifts for friends and or family. They hold a lot of special sentiment, especially if you get a crystal that will assist in the person’s life/goals/ aspirations.

http://liveloveinspiredream.com/

http://liveloveinspiredream.com/tiny-devotions/

http://www.crystal-cure.com/gemstone-meanings.html

Thursday, June 3, 2010

New Chapter...

Thursday June 3, 2010...nothing! UHG...where did the time go? I already miss the fact that I won’t have to rush home, change into my semi clean yoga clothes and speed to Burlington. Although teacher training is complete...our gathering isn’t. A bunch of us are getting together tonight at the “LSD Yoga Palace”
“The LSD Yoga Palace”

Sounds bad if I don’t explain myself. “Lindsey, Shannon & Devon” Yoga Palace.

I moved into my new place last Saturday. My Dad, my brother Chris and my amazing friend Amanda helped me move in. I had finally finished packing the night before. I total of 12 boxes I think, a bed, nightstands, two dressers and my new TV. We started early, after Chris and I finished our Tim’s of course. It was such a beautiful day too. Thank god it wasn’t raining. I love how Amanda showed up in yoga clothes...ready to work! We started to bring everything downstairs, and Amanda and I even did one of my dressers. “Who said yoga doesn’t make you strong!”
We only made two trips from my parent’s home to my home. It was much easier saying bye to my Mom on the front lawn then the airport balling my eyes out. At least we didn’t make a scene this time.
My Dad and Chris got started on putting together my new bed, while Amanda and I unpacked my toiletries into my new bathroom. We listened to music, while Chris and my Dad discussed the finale of LOST. I gave my two cents where I could until they changed the topic to golf.
We finished around 1pm. I thanked Amanda SO much for ALL her help and she did WAY more than what was asked (AMAZING friend!) I went back to my parent’s house to eat lunch. I also went grocery shopping in their fridge.
I drove back to my new place and started unpacking. I HAD to. I hate living out of boxes and knew I needed to be settled and comfortable. Lindsey came home and was completely startled that was I ALL MOVED IN AND SETTLED! We hung out for a bit, but I was EXHAUSTED and dirty! While she and Jay (her BF) ate dinner I went and showered. That night I went out with Linds, her BF Jay and his friends. HOW much fun was that!?! Despite the fact that I wanted to pass out...I had a blast meeting all these interesting new people. I know I’ll only meet more in the future.
Monday morning was beautiful. I woke up and did my first yoga session on our back deck overlooking the golf course...heaven! I couldn’t help but smile the entire time, and remind myself that LIFE IS GOOD!

I’ve had my moments of uncertainty, and concern...but that’s a “Borycheski” trait I’m stuck with. Some of the same feelings from Vancouver hit me over the weekend and I do have to admit, I broke down. Whether it was the exhaustion or the first time I stopped and realized what has happened to me over the last 18 months. HOLY SHIT! So much has changed, and my emotions got the best of me. I guess something needed to be released. I continued to think about all the positives rather than the negatives. I live with two of the most amazing woman. Lindsey and Shannon have lived on their own for a while and we’ve all gone through similar things. They’re smart, responsible, but know how to live laugh and love! I feel I will learn a lot through them and this experience.

Tonight we’re having all our teacher training friends over for some food, wine and relaxation...NO studying, but I can’t promise there won’t be any YOGA!

Life is good...changing everyday...I’m up for the challenge and I will prove I’m willing and able!

2 ½ weeks (June 20th) until I teach my class in Burlington...EXCITED!!!

Friday, May 28, 2010

CERTIFIED & THANKFUL!


WHERE to start!?!

Well...I’ve graduated! I’ve successfully completed 200+ hours of Yoga Teacher Training and I am officially a Certified Yoga Practitioner!! I feel ALIVE with energy, success, courage and spirit! What a journey this has become...and I’ve said it MANY times before... It doesn’t end here.

I remember when we first started the teacher training, looking around the room at these woman and men and being overwhelmed with beauty, grace, knowledge, FLEXIBILITY, and strength! I would have NEVER thought that I was going to end up loving these people the way I do today. I would have never imagined the friendships, support, laughter and excitement I was granted because of this course. For this and so much more, I am truly grateful!

When I began the course I remember saying “I just wanna learn Dancer’s” SEE...I’ve changed! “Just” What was I thinking? I guess I wasn’t thinking. I wasn’t aware of HOW much I would learn, what doors would open for me and how far down the rabbit hole my mind was able to go. No doubt this WAS challenging for me at times. I think at times EVERY one of us felt like we might not be cut out for this, or actually strong enough to proceed. Along with the support of my loved ones, family and friends, my Kula...I survived and NEVER gave up! About my “goal” I CAN do Dancer’s, it’s MY Dancer’s and it’s beautiful! I can also do Adho Mukha Svanasana, Adho Mukha Vrksasana, Ardha Chandrasana and Eka Pada Rajakapotasana, which is one of my favorites! I’ve learned that it’s not about “looking” a certain way, it’s about feeling it. Not only have I learned to move my body in ways I only imagined. I’ve learned about WHO I am, WHO I want to be and HOW I will get there. I’ve accomplished a lot over the last yr and especially the last 6 months. I’ve reached a lot of goals, which has led me to only add more to the list. Over the next year I would like to continue to teach in a yoga studio, teach privates/one on ones. Start a Yoga class during lunch and/or before work at the company I work for. Raise money and take part in more fundraisers. Travel to Bali, take as many yoga workshops/trainings as I can…and continue along the path of enlightenment. Sounds good right!?
I look forward to reaching ALL my goals, adding new ones to the list and really pushing my boundaries. I know I have a million people rooting for me on the sidelines and I am SO appreciative that you’ll be able to watch me grow and witness my dreams become my reality.

I want to begin thanking my parents for ALL the support they gave me during this course. From the day I brought it to their attention they weren’t hesitant, they told me to GO FOR IT and have believed in my from the beginning. I owe them more than they realize and I love them MORE and more each day. I remember coming home after LATE Thursday night practices and being filled with excitement and couldn’t wait to tell my Dad what I had just learned or did. I remember my Mom always being SO amazed with how much work I was doing...and always made me feel SO great and accomplished! I love you both SO much! XoXo

Thank you to my brother Chris for being the one to introduce me to yoga! WOW...can you believe this!?! Your support and guidance have been more than wonderful. I am truly grateful to have such a close, loving, caring brother who isn’t afraid to be honest with me. I look forward to doing yoga together, sharing what I’ve learned and finally paying you back for ALL you’ve taught me. I look up to you and you really do inspire me! Thank you for ALWAYS being there for me...I love you! XoXo

Thank you to my Aunt Irene who I have found a beautiful relationship with. I have enjoyed ALL our emails and conversations. I truly believe you were brought into my life NOW to mentor me through all of this and BOY was it enlightening. I know we’re only going to deepen our relationship and that’s SO exciting for me! I look forward to learning more about you, and myself, together. I love you! XoXo

Thank you to ALL my amazing friends (especially the ones who actually “followed” me!) and family for reading my blog and being so interested in my journey! I loved hearing your thoughts about my entries and loved having to explain them to you after. Thank you for coming to support my yoga fundraiser and trying yoga for the first time...even though it wasn’t YOUR thing. You have NO idea what this meant to me, and how grateful I am that EACH of you is in my life. You’ve been MORE than supportive and I really look forward to sharing more with all of you in the future. True friendships like these don’t come very often and I know each of you will be in my life forever! I love you!! XoXo


Yogies:

Steph J- I know we’re connected deeper than both of us probably even realize. I’m glad YOU understand my spirit, help me flourish and expand and I NEED you to know I love you and am truly appreciative that we have an everlasting bond. Tiny Devotions just got THAT much better!!! I love you.

Amanda- I LOVE your sweaty hands. Your early morning emails. Your love for your family, Ryan, and Tyson (Murphy needs to meet him!). You make me laugh, you GET me and I love how HONEST and genuine you are! Thank you for helping me move into my new home...get use to it cause you’ll practically be living there too. P.S THANK YOU FOR FINALLY stepping into the world of technology and getting a NEW phone that WORKS! I love you!

Shannon- SHANNONAGINS! I LOVE that I’m going to be able to laugh so hard with you EVERYDAY...and I’ll I have to do is walk 10 feet to the bedroom beside me! This is so exciting and I can’t wait for all of this to begin. Thank you for having the idea and asking me to move in....you’ve changed my life! I can’t wait for more fun nights by the fire with marshmallows and wine! It’s been a blast watching you “stay integrated and shit!” I love you!

Lindsey-Your brain amazes me to no end! I adore the way you think and how incredibly intelligent you are. I can’t WAIT to live with you and hear a different side to things. Thank you for having the idea and asking me to move it...this is JUST the start Tinkerbell! You inspire me and make me want to LEARN! I WAIT for the day when you run across the hall into my room and say “LOOK WHAT I JUST LEARNED” Teach me how to tumble. I love you!!

Michelle-You love my blog...you READ my blog and are truly genuinely interested! THANKS! I love how fragile you are but how HOLY SHIT strong you are! I really loved talking with you and the advice you always gave to me was not only RIGHT...but REAL! SCREAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM!!! I look forward to you coming over and always being the first to try a new drink we made up like marshmallows and baileys. Be careful with those plastic tongs! Your hugs lift my spirit! I love you!

Emily- My dearest sweetheart. HOW cute are you!?! We have a bond (FISH!) I wrote about you in my first blog and TODAY, I’m SO glad to have been given the chance to work with you, get to know you, cry with you, and most of all love you! You always think of other first and ALWAYS make sure that everyone’s included. Thanks for that AMAZING lunch time phone call...and for future reference...I’m ALWAYS feeling spontaneous! Lookin forward to LOTS of cuddles! I love you.

Grant: Not only do you AMAZE me, but you inspire me and make me BELIEVE! You have this courage and strength that radiate right to my heart, but you do everything with such grace and beauty. I remember when I asked if you could bring me back a shell when you went on your retreat and not only did you bring me back a shell...you brought two of the most beautiful fragile shells I’ve ever seen, in a deodorant bottle wrapped in Kleenex that I STILL have! Thank you for always going above and beyond. I really look forward to working and learning SO much for with you.

Colin- Last...but not least. I can’t begin to tell you what this journey has done for me. The friends and family who read this blog KNOW how much you mean to me. You always gave it to me straight up and knew things before I did. You’re remarkable with your talents and truly have a wonderful gift. Thanks for giving me this opportunity to shine, believe and SHOW me I actually DO have the force within! I look forward to EVERYTHING the future holds...this is SO exciting.

To the 26+ other amazing yogi superstars in my Teacher Training 2010. THANK YOU! It has been a pleasure getting to know EACH and every one of you. Working with you, and moving closer and closer toward each of our goals. These friendships are true and everlasting. I know I don’t have to say “keep in touch”...as we are each other’s KULA!
Kim, Tree, Lisa, Patricia, Jenny, Sarah, Aspasia, Geralyn, Kaja, Derek, Sandra, Mary Lynn, Steph C, Izabela, Jaunita, Janet, Daphne, Daniel, Sheri, Simone, Paola. XoXo!!!

Please remember to stay true to yourself; live in the moment...and KNOW when you’re at the front of that yoga room leading a practice you have the STRENGTH and SUPPORT of ALL of us behind you! We’re all amazing and should be VERY proud of ourselves...

FASTEN YOUR SEATBELTS....HERE WE GOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Namaste Xo

Thursday, May 20, 2010

The last 4 days...for now...

This is our last 4 day yoga retreat. Bitter sweet I guess. I can’t believe how fast the time has flown by. Over these past months I have learned more than I could ever imagine; not only about yoga, but myself as well. I have met the most amazing people, and have been a part of some of the most exciting opportunities imaginable. I am honestly sad, although I know there is no reason I should be. I’m moving into my new place with two incredible women next weekend that I met through this course. I am positive that the yoga will just become an even bigger part of my life, considering we call our place the “yoga palace” and everyone is ALWAYS welcome. I’m pretty sure the other girls will practically live there as well. It’s like summer camp. You’re so sad to see it end ...but you see everyone at school the next day.

I lived for these weekends. The long, physically, mentally and emotionally exhausting practices, the lectures from some of the most interesting people in the world. The friendships, the lunches, the “Napaste”. The laughing, Wildseed lunches, Metro lunches. Tim’s bagels, being hung-over and doing yoga, sorority weekends, the teachers...and the list can go on.

The journey doesn’t end here...this is only the beginning....

Namaste!

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

...and I’m feeling good!

I signed up for my first Community class in Burlington on June 20th, and my first Community class in Oakville on July 4th. I am actually excited about these classes now. What do I have to be scared of right? I’ve learned a lot, I’m strong...and I’m just like everyone else that will be in the room that day. I just want to feel good and do yoga...so that’s why I’m there.

I worked another one on one session with Simps last Monday. I organized a flow for us to do based on what she wanted to work in her body. I realized how similar we were, and I had to kind of laugh because this is Colin must have felt working with me in the beginning.
Simps has the drive...but doesn’t believe in herself 100%. She WANTS this...but is that enough? She’s been VERY vocal and honest about our journey together which I really admire and respect. This not only helps her...but teaches me a great deal. I told her she’s REALLY testing everything I’ve learned which is truly valued. We worked really hard on Monday and I beyond doubt tested her limits. I realize now that maybe that wasn’t the best use of my knowledge. I have to go back and remember where and when I got the MOST out of my time with Colin and Grant. I remember specifically the therapeutics part of the yoga. Learning about the body, the muscles and HOW they move together. I have to remember that Simps doesn’t know what I know and I do need to start at the beginning with simple things like shoulder flossing to be able to first experience the movement and recognise the FEEL and placement of those muscles and body parts. I mentioned to Simps that I can only be there to support and guide her, but ultimately this is up to her and “HOW BAD DOES SHE WANT IT?!” I like that we’re similar with the “wanting” aspect. Wanting the “goal” the “end result” the “correct pose” so bad...I’ve had to learn how to just be present in the moment, and when I’m ready, things will start to shift and happen. I’ve also learned that there’s a LOT more to it than “the pose”
I look forward to meeting with Simps again next week and just getting back to the basics with her.

I had my first Reiki treatment with Kaja (another friend from teacher training) yesterday. I didn’t know what to expect as I’ve never had a treatment before. I liked that I had no expectations as it made it easier to relax.
Kaja brought me into her room and had me lay down on the table. She told me to close my eyes, relax and if I fell asleep...even better! She mentioned I should start out with meditation, and concentrating on my breath. Well, I tried. Again my brain wouldn’t shut off. I tried not to get caught up in the thoughts. She walked around me placing her hand on different parts of my body. Head, shoulders, stomach and working her way down, then again on the other side of my body. A few times I caught myself sleeping/dreaming and forced myself out of it. I’m not sure why I felt like I needed to “come back” but I did. I don’t remember enough of what I dreamt about, but I do remember thinking “WEIRD!”
Other than the heat from Kaja’s hands, I didn’t feel much during the apt, except at one point my entire body tingled. It was like I had pins and needles EVERYWHERE, but the good kind, not the painful kind. If there is such a difference. It was about an hr later Kaja softly woke me up and we talked about our experience. She told me I had a lot of great energy flowing through me and I definitely had “the touch” this means a lot to me as there have been quite a few people tell me they love my hands. They’ve told me they feel something when I touch them. No one can really explain WHAT they feel they just always say “wow you have great hands” Just in yoga, this has happened on 4 different occasions with different people. I keep coming back to the fact that maybe I should have continued my dream of being a massage therapist? But then again...if I should have been...wouldn’t I be? Who knows, maybe my assisting/adjusting in yoga is where I can really thrive with this energy. She felt I was a very grounded individual when she touched my feet. When she touched my shoulders...”Sparkles!” is the word she used to describe the energy. She said she’s only experienced that with one other person. She thought maybe it was just the one shoulder but felt the same thing when she touched the other. She said it was electrifying. I’m not really sure what to do with this information...so I’ll just sit with it for now. She mentioned needing extra love and energy around my stomach (if you know me...this is true!) and my heart (again...VERY true!) However she also told me this “Stop searching for the answers, and stop looking for others for the answers...you already know have all the answers you need” I couldn’t say anything, and just laughed because I KNOW! Kaja ended with telling me that the one thing that came out the most is what a happy individual I am. Not just always smiling on the outside, but I truly am happy and positive on the inside too. Overall I couldn’t of asked for a more real, exciting, joyful experience. I got to know Kaja more and I guess I finally got the closure and recognition I needed for myself to heal the things I wanted. Kaja mentioned to just take it easy for the rest of the night, drink lots of water as most people tend to crash due to the amount of energy flowing through their body.

I went to yoga! LOL

I definitely agree with being exhausted afterward. I felt bad during yoga because I kept yawning every 3 minutes. Christine worked us HARD! This was certainly not an easy class last night and I was interested to see how my practice went. I noticed I was a lot more present than usual and although being very tired, I had a lot more energy, not to mention the smirk I had on my face the entire time. I just felt wonderful, inside and out. I went home and had the best sleep I’ve had in a long time.

Things ARE changing and shifting...I can feel it!